Of Heartbreak and Authenticity

(Photo: typical Cajun homestead, Vermillionville Cultural Center, Louisiana)

(Previously published on Nov. 20, 2015)

 

I am fascinated at the multidimensional changes that accompany ending communication with someone we love:

– The physically painful drop in addictive ‘feel good’ neurotransmitters, and the physically painful death of neurological wiring.

– The way the heart randomly skips beats, gasping, at the emotional sadness, feeling the loss of ‘beauty that was’.

– The grinding sudden contractions of energy as the grief waves ride through, mourning the ‘beauty of what could have been’…

Love is not for the feint of heart. Clearly.

But! It is an Observer’s feast of how much love is *the* intersection of our entire existence!…sending ripples in all levels and directions, pulling the fascia of our whole beingness into one solid line of internal tension and grip.

!!!!

This kind of experience takes us to the edge of our current level of internal skillfulness. Shows us the current *limits* of what we think we can have, who we see ourselves as, what our distractions for comfort are, what our resourcefulness looks like, what our level of Will is.

At the hardest depths of it, it asks, ‘Who are you, and what are you here for?’

A wake up call to your deepest authenticity.

Whew.

And if that wasn’t already enough good news, here’s more:

While it hurts like Hell, and feels like Hell, somewhere in the spirit world, in answer to your prayer asking for a miracle! a yell of “Clear!” comes through, and the divine electric paddles are rubbed together and applied straight to your heart, sending jolts of recognition, grace, and information on a way forward.

At that moment, you can either turn the corner and come back to your life/creativity, and surf the shrinking grief waves with purpose and Will and a desire to live fully again. Or… not.

Having spent the last three weeks deeply observing and feeling all this rolling through… here is my hope:

May all those detoxing heartbreak recognize it for the *breakthrough* in authenticity and clarity it actually is.

“My barn having burned, I can now see the moon.”

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